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Existential dread is a feeling that everyone experiences at some point in their life. It doesn’t matter if you are well-adjusted or not. It’s a sadness that creeps up on you and settles into your bones, rendering you incapable of doing anything but allowing it to take over your thoughts. And at this moment, many of us are feeling it.
Two plus years of a pandemic, major political division, and watching a war play out on social media is enough collective trauma to cripple anyone’s mental health. It’s hard to go about daily life when existential dread sets in. I’ve personally struggled with this problem for the past few months, but I’ve found ways to cope with existential dread and I’m going to share them with you.
How to Stop Existential Dread
Before you can stop existential dread, you may need to spend a little time exploring it. When the news that Russia invaded Ukraine hit me, I knew I would feel some panic. I also knew that I had the tools to calm that panic, but I wasn’t ready to use them. I needed to feel it. I needed to cry and sympathize with the people who were suffering. For me, that was an important, and conscious decision. Feeling these strong emotions is part of the human experience.
We’re all experiencing varying levels of trauma right now, we may not be directly involved but watching war is traumatic. Going through the isolation and changes of a global pandemic is traumatic. Feeling like democracy is holding on by a thread is traumatic. Take solace in the fact that you’re not alone.
If you’re reading this article, chances are that you’re ready to take some action. Here’s how to stop your existential dread:
1. Allow yourself to worry — you may feel you’ve already done this step enough. If that’s the case, move on to step two. If not, set a timer for 10-15 minutes and go down the rabbit hole. Read articles, watch YouTube videos, do whatever you need to do. But when the timer goes off stop. You’re done.
2. Write them down — Grab pen and paper, open a note on your phone, pull up a blank e-mail, it doesn’t matter how just get ready to write. Now, I want you to set a timer for 10 minutes and write down every worry that’s making you feel existential dread.
3. Take a break — This work is mentally exhausting. Take a step back, take a break, and when you’re ready come back.
Take Action to Stop Existential Dread
Anxiety isn’t always bad. It’s a survival instinct that has kept humans alive for thousands of years. Sometimes it’s important to listen to anxiety.
Now that you’ve written down all your worries, go through each one of them and write down what action you can take to address the worry. If there’s nothing you can do, then leave it blank. We’ll come back to those later in this post. Once you have a list of actions to take, you can plan to implement those changes.
When I was feeling dread, I realized that I was completely unprepared for emergencies. Of course, there are the big things like nuclear war and authoritarian government, but there are also many realistic scenarios that most of us will face. Power outages, extreme cold or heat, and flooding are all real issues that will only increase in the coming years. So, I made a plan to start preparing for these eventualities. The Prepared website and Ready.gov are great apolitical resources for this. But it’s important to note that you shouldn’t go into a panic mode when taking these types of actions. It’s not good for your mental health, or your wallet. In my example with preparedness, I am doing a little bit each month to make sure my family has the basic supplies they need.
How to Cope With Existential Dread
There are many ways to cope with existential dread, and when used in combination they can be quite effective.
Stay Informed in a Healthy Way
Coping with existential dread can sometimes be at odds with your desire to stay informed. Luckily there are ways you can keep up with the news without endlessly doomscrolling. First and foremost, know that social media is ripe with misinformation, and it’s very difficult to discern what’s accurate and what’s not. Try to limit your use of social media as much as possible and take everything you read with a huge grain of salt. You should also avoid sharing content because it could help spread misinformation.
Know that opinion pieces are just that, opinions. Someone may be an expert in their field, but no one can predict the future. Oftentimes, some claim about the future will be made by a scholar and several media outlets will pick it up. When people read it, they treat it as fact. It’s just an educated guess, and sometimes it’s not educated at all.
When looking for news, use reliable fact-based sources. The two most unbiased organizations for news reporting are Associated Press and Reuters. These are the sources that newsrooms turn to for the most up-to-date reporting. How do I know this? I have a degree in journalism, and I used to be a news producer. And, if that’s not enough to convince you, check out the Media Bias Chart from Ad Fontes Media. They use, “a rigorous, reproducible methodology – and a politically balanced team of analysts – to rate that content, both for bias and for reliability.” AP and Reuters sit at the top of the pyramid, smack dab in the middle.
Set Boundaries
While it’s important to stay informed, endlessly consuming content is likely what got you here in the first place. You need to set limits for yourself and there are a few ways you can do that.
1. Plan out times for reading news — Decide when you’re going to consume content. I like to read the news in the morning, at lunchtime, and in the evening right before or after dinner. Avoid checking the news before bed.
2. Set a timer — when reading news or scrolling through social media you need to set limits for yourself. Use a timer.
3. Set app limits — think of this as the next level of protection. If you have trouble sticking to a schedule and setting timers, you can go into your phone settings and set time limits for individual apps.
4. Put your devices in timeout — At this point, you may really be struggling to stop doomscrolling. You need to put your devices in timeout. You could try to leave your phone in a different room, but let’s face it, if you’re at this point you probably don’t have the discipline to stick to that. And that’s ok, I struggle with the same issue, but you need a more concrete way to protect your mental health. I highly recommend buying a timed lockbox for your devices. iDiskk makes one that allows you to keep your phone charged while it’s in time out, and it’s rated A by Fakespot review analyzer. Or, if you need something bigger for your phone, tablet, and other devices then this Kitchen Safe Locking Container should do the trick.
5. Completely disengage — You need to assess your own mental health. If you’re struggling to create distance from the issues that are causing you to worry, then you’re headed for burnout. I created a method called Burnout First Aid that can be used to prevent and treat burnout symptoms. You can read about it here.
Consider Optimistic Nihilism
I’m not an expert on philosophy and optimistic nihilism is a new concept to me, but it could provide a different perspective.
“Optimistic nihilism views the belief that there is no underlying meaning to life from a perspective of hope. It’s not that we’re doomed to live in a meaningless universe–it’s that we get the chance to experience ourselves and the universe we share.” — Louis Laves-Webb
So, it’s about reframing your view. If everything will all end eventually, and the universe will cease to exist, does anything really matter? Optimistic nihilism from my limited understanding seems to suggest that meaning is derived from our human experience. The below video from Kurzgesagt offers a great overview.
This idea seems to coincide with mindfulness. It’s the small moments of your life that matter. The taste of food, the touch of a loved one, a kind moment from a stranger, a stroll through the neighborhood. These are the small things that make life worth living. Bringing focus to the present and being mindful of tiny moments of joy throughout the day can bring you happiness. At the end of the day, I often ask my kids, “what was the best part of your day?” You can use this same question to be more mindful of small moments.
Practice Mindfulness and Meditation
As I mentioned, mindfulness is all about being present in any given moment. There are many different mindfulness techniques you can practice, and noticing, which I outlined above, is one of them.
In my opinion, the best way to become more mindful is by practicing meditation. If you’re struggling with existential dread, and you’re someone who meditates, I recommend stepping up your practice. If you’re new to meditation I highly recommend the Calm app. I don’t have a partnership with Calm, and I don’t earn a dime if you sign-up, but I do strongly believe in their product. Calm has a learn to meditate series which is an excellent introduction. Or you could try the Daily Calm, or search for emergency sessions.
Fully realizing the benefits of meditation takes time and consistency, but even newcomers can see results. Meditation helps you focus your attention on the present moment. Even if only for a few minutes, this can bring a tremendous sense of peace.
Spend Time in Nature
The American Psychological Association reports that spending time in nature has cognitive benefits. Yale School of the Environment also asserts that multiple studies have shown that time in nature is an antidote for stress, and can offer physiological health benefits.
Personally, I can attest to this. Hiking, kayaking or simply sitting outside always improves my mood. Finding some time to get outside can truly benefit your state of mind.
Accept What You Can’t Control
One of the simplest ways you can find mental peace is through acceptance. Remember that list of worries you wrote and the ones that you couldn’t take action on? Try to accept the fact that you can’t control everything. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) really helped me get to this point.
Think about it this way. Imagine your worst possible scenario will come true. How do you want to live your life up to that point? If everything is going to end, do you want to spend the rest of your existence a nervous wreck about it? Give in to the peace that comes with accepting all fates. Chances are nothing bad will happen to you but worrying about it constantly will certainly cause you pain and suffering.
This is demonstrated in the Netflix film “Don’t Look Up.” Spoiler alert if you haven’t seen it, but at the end of the movie the family is sitting at the dinner table when everything comes crashing down. They are not panicked, they have accepted their fate, and in those final moments that brings them peace.
Stopping Existential Dread Isn’t Easy
Mentally tackling the quickly changing nature of the world is a challenging feat. The methods outlined in this post may only help a little. Making a concerted effort to focus on your mental health is the best way to make progress.
Practice loving-kindness towards yourself. You’re human, dealing with existential dread is a monumental challenge, and letting go of anxiety is really hard. Additionally, for understanding and strategies to cope with anxiety, check out — The Ultimate Guide to Anxiety: A Deep Dive from Someone Who’s Been There.
I hope this post helps you find some relief, and I wish you peace and calm.
